The rule and the exception in dating

Get inspired by our founder and team and our network of mentors and coaches around the world! Do you have something to share that could help lift up other women? Let us know! After all, they all follow the tannar dating is mully general storyline. Boy and girl meet. Boy and here lose each other. Boy and girl live happily every after.

Woman Man

Why do people continue being involved with unavailable people or even assclowns? Why do people keep carrying the same beliefs, baggage, and behaviours, choosing the same types of people, different package and expecting different results? Relationship insanity is doing all of those things and continuing to expect to get a different result — that is looking to be the exception. When you persist in being the exception, you end up doing and being things that detract from you because you make exceptions — cue boundary busting, excuse making, illusion conjuring and turning a restore purchases itunes eye. As long as you persist in trying to get people and life to make you the exception, you are highly likely to continue experiencing the pain of the rule. In trying to be the exception, it fundamentally means that you know the rule. Is the rule of what you experience telling you that you need to make changes?

The Exception and the Rule - Wikipedia


Woman Man

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You need to get yourself to a place where, when the right guy does come along, you will be emotionally prepared to engage. Focus on yourself instead. You are right, Minky. He was not right for me. Plus I spent years married to a man with similar red flags, called him on those, tried to change him, but I was miserable. And the change would never last, since he was only doing it to placate me. I guess what I am asking when I say did miss something, is the question of exactly how hard should I try to make a relationship work?

Should I see the red flags and just turn around and run, or should I try to work with them on these red flags? If you were just married to someone with the same red flags, why would you then choose to be with someone else with the same issues? You already know the rule. What do you think is so different this time that the same issues should now make you the exception? Thanks for your response.

From reading your site, and from my own experience, I would have said these were signs to abort mission and not stay and try to change him. He was different than my ex in that he knew what his issues were, and even said he would change for the right woman. So, yes, I did attract the same type of man again, but I did abort the mission, because I did not believe he would change. If a man outright tells me he would be willing to change, should I believe him?

Put aside the first three, you cannot change someone not being over their ex. If you get involved with them while they pine for their ex, they use you as an emotional airbag to get over their ex and provide the bridge to the new relationship. Why, would you meet a man and at the very beginning be looking for change? Why do all of your relationships have to involve them changing and carrying red flag behaviour? Because the fact is, while we all have some stuff to deal with, it is not the norm to blow hot and cold, to be a flake, to be a drunk and a druggie and to not be over an ex.

It is completely unhealthy to be attracted to someone with addictions especially when you are aware of it from the outset and that is more of a concern for you to address in the first instance.

Has he changed? You made your decision, own your judgement. You should only be willing to believe someone is going to change when they have already been doing so for a period of time, they are doing it for themselves, they are willing to seek the help they need without your involvement and they are doing it independently of you anyway.

I want men to make me the exception, because somehow I must believe that it will make up for what was lacking in my relationship with my dad. Intellectually, I get it, but on some deeper level, I still struggle with the same patterns. After my divorce, I went to counseling once a week for two years, joined self-help groups, etc.

I saw patterns from my childhood and I saw where these unhealthy beliefs came from. Lots of self-awareness. But to put that into actual real-world practice? Different story.

I have female friends to talk to, but their relationship habits are as unhealthy as mine. And then there are those who have overcome bad relationship habits, and are now married. I think they mean well, but I also think they have long forgotten the pain of the struggle. They dismiss my concerns in a sentence or two and move on to the next subject. I admit, I bought into it for a while, because it totally fit in with my co-dependency.

I actually thought I was being noble, loving, understanding, etc. I used to have a certain way to telling my story of past relationships, and now, when I really listen to what I am saying, it sounds insane. Baggage Reclaim is the first place I have come to where there seems to be a real understanding of what this struggle is like. I am learning, for the first time, in a practical, real-world way, to tell my arse from my elbow, and to tell the difference between bad behavior and normal relationship stuff that needs to be worked out.

I find myself doing quite well, and then having a setback. I am just so glad I can come here and talk about it with others who get it. I am very grateful for all of you on this site. You make some very good points, especially about self-esteem. I just found out yesterday about them getting married, so I am re-visiting the grief again. Wow another spot on post to where I am right now!

Nothing too blatant yet but a slight flakiness,possible unavailability and sings very much to his own tune. No way am I going back to Assclownville!

Been there,done that and never been the exception. I was just thinking of you about an hour ago so great to hear from you. Make sure that there are genuine reasons for your wariness and if there are, make a decision based on that. If in doubt, you can always ask him — that removes all ambiguity. Thanks a mil,Natalie,really appreciate your input. Because even though we,here at BR,are enlightened, the dating pool continues as murky as ever. Same old casual behaviour which assclowns luxuriate in.

Two dates and lots of phone chats. Available people make plans and stick to them and things move at a reasonable pace. And I know you advise against it but,as long as we keep our eyes very wide open,it is a dating option, though far from ideal. My peace of mind comes first and I really see my boundaries as my personal electric fence. Big hugs. But you know at least the guy just looking for fun and who openly states it,is at least being upfront and not misleading anyone.

You expend energy on these dipsticks hoping that each new one might just be the exception and he inevitably turns out to be a clone of all the others. Thank you for this post Natalie! Then, when I was fed up with basically being an option, he begged me to be his friend…aka, a spot on the narcissistic harem roster. Not good. In my case, I tried to be the exception to the rule of what our relationship had always been and got burnt. I knew I was going to find something or learn something in the near future why all my relationships failed.

I discovered core belief engineering but it was dollars for a day session which was the minimum requirement to join the program. I declined it and then went on and said I am going to find out a way cheaper way and this is HOW I found this site, thank goodness. I feel this way because I have done so much self work but to no avail.

I keep ending up in the same place. I am good at opting out after a period of suffering but I am not good at finding someone healthy for me. I keep worrying about my friends being the exception to the rule with all their emotionally unavailable men and again think it is simply me that is the issue. I am the repelling one that is the problem in all the cases.

Now reading this site, the fact that I have left unhealthy situations, and the fact that I live a pretty healthy life tells me all of this with not one doubt is complete bull. So why then do I have such a struggle with full recovery. I know better on a logical basis but my self doubts do keep getting in the way even though I counter them every single time with the word BULL.

I keep saying my ex is unhealthy, I am glad I am out but then why does his new girlfriend fight for him is there something about him I should of fought for and again the answer apppears in big letters BULL!!!

I am away from him, I am surrounded by more positive people, I am not living in pain anymore, I am drama free, I am working on personal, posivitive goals. I like the serenity in my life but I miss the companionship, fun, and closeness but again I always counter not with him because he came with drama and crap. Why is it not out there for me, I keep asking.

I know because I keep asking that can be the problem but when I put myself out there nothing comes my way. I talk to guys online, talk to guys at work, at the grocery store, out and about with friends.

All these guys have approached me but not one for a date. I feel undatable. I get it, stop wondering! If the rule keeps getting in the way, how do I break this pattern? I do feel your pain and confusion in your post about wondering why you were not made an exception of. Sometimes when we get caught up in a spiral of negative thinking and wondering to questions we can never hope to answer then we are giving away all our self deternmination and power to find answers we CAN work on and understand.

Negative rumination just robs YOU of your power. MH, you do deserve a good person and love in yourlife from someone special who will always be with you whereever you go and wherever you are.

That person is YOU. Choose to love YOU first. That is why I am doing a blog at the moment to learn to love me first and then choose better choices in love and all areas of my life. Actually MH what you think your self-fulfilling prophecy and what it actually is are two entirely different things.

For a start, a self-fulfilling prophecy is what you predict is likely to happen based on your beliefs. You have predicted based on your beliefs about you and your capabilities in the context of relationships and life that you only have two options, hence you are going to live out life like you have two options.

Why do you seem to believe that you are some sort of exceptional case that has singled you out as the one person in the universe who will not be made an exception to the unavailable rule? What did you think was going to happen? That you read something, make some initial changes and bam, man falls out of the sky? Get behind your decision, stop doubting yourself and address your core beliefs about love, relationships and yourself and judge your life based on you, not on others.

Relationship insanity is taking the same baggage, beliefs, and behaviours and expecting different results. Which of those three have you not addressed?

But you know, my enthusiasm for him has gone finally. Some part of me felt I deserved no better. But recently, for the first time in a very, very long time, I thought — Hmm, I want to be around a person brings their own happiness to the table and does not suck out all of mine, so they can feel like they are alive.

I gave it all away! Be single so I have serenity in my life and can work through my goals without a new relationship screwing it up when it fails. I have tried to not be this cynical but my life experiences keep ending up in the same spot. I work through my issues only to be back in relationship insanity but instead of looking over my steps and seeing myself doing the same things but expecting different results. I see myself doing different things and thinking differently however back there again.

My repeat bad experiences are causing me to have no trust. I will put myself out there sticking within the rule and find myself later saying why did I even think it would work out. Like I said in my first reply to this post, I think I finally want to be the exception because the rule is always stopping me.

I get tired and I want a breakthrough. MH, I think I may know exactly how you feel. Ok, so I stopped doing that. The men I met still only wanted sex from me, while dating other women. I think the only answer is to just opt out as soon as the warning signs present themselves. However, it still hurts when that happens.

Hang in there — you are not alone! That is the frustrating part, we know how to opt out, we know when but we prolong it because we got invested. We know the drill afterwards.

My friend and I vented this morning and I wanted to cry because she was hitting it so perfectly when she said they act like we cross the line by wanting them to treat us with decency. That there is the rule, they say jump and we are suppose to. They want everything on their terms and when you want mutual respect you are out of line.

You break it off with them and in their own way they say I never said you could do that. You are wanting just one of them to treat you like the exception by finally saying I am out of line for chasing you, pretending to be what you want. But instead they are the rule they show you who they are and expect you to comply with their every need and not have any needs of your own.

You know this drill and you say no not again, this one was different, his ways were different how can I end up here again.

Thanks again for letting me know I am not alone, now if only we could regain our trust in ourselves so we could conquer our issues. I think you should give yourself a lot of credit for that — I sure do!! MH I went down this route with my counsellor and he said it was more subtle than going speed-dating, internet dating, etc. I do need to stop thinking of my ex and his new girlfriend because it is detrimental to me to continue on this way.

Any suggestions on how to go about this? I am proud of you for figuring it out in your work world and I wish you the best with figuring out in your romantic world. MH, I completely empathise with your frustration. And it is soul destroying. I do get extremely upset over it and though I recover pretty quickly and dust myself down,like you,I would have major trust issues and find it very hard to be positive going forward again.

My advice to you is to keep trying. Love is worth searching for so why give up? The quicker out the better,though still hugely disappointing,I know. Secondly,go easy on yourself. We can go overboard with all this self analysis. Many of us here at BR are light years ahead of many out there as we are so enlightened. Like choclates in a box,the good ones get snatched up quickly. So stop stressin and obsessin,replace negative thoughts with positive,relax a bit and some day it will come good for you.

It was a weird little high I got from not being in a realty, but a fantasy. I can only hope that I will make healthy choices from what I have learned, this site has enlightened me and make sense of all the madness which has taken me years of development. Do I have this correctly: A If you are involved with a married man by definition he is unavailable. B The rule is: He will not leave his wife to be with me.

Therefore C , I will never be the exception to the rule no matter how much I do for him, think about him, and throw tantrums. Natalie, you must have the patience of a saint. You keep saying things backwards, forwards, and upside down. I think I may have finally heard you with this post. It really is no more complicated than that, especially when by definition of continuing to be involved with them and them continuing to stay, they establish that they rule is indeed that they do stay with their wife.

Oh my god, it is amazing how seemingly complicated issues can be so simple. I have struggled and so resisted such a simple, self-evident rule. You are so right, if he was going to leave, he would have left when the affair started.

Again, darn simple. I hope I never have to find out whether if I could have my cake and eat it, whether I would. Being the other woman was totally miserable and I hope I would never to that to another person.

Today was a giant leap forward. Thank you Natalie and to all who have posted. He is blocked from all forms of cybercommunication. Fairy tales suck. Thank you. If he meets another woman, realizes maybe already had previously realized that his marriage is over, then he will almost immediately leave his wife and take up with the new woman. He will do so with as little drama and strife as possible.

He will not try to dig at his wife and make things worse, he will try to make it as clean a break as possible. I dated a man who DID leave his wife when he met me, filed for divorce and moved in right away.

After about 2 weeks…I started to wake up and think…wtf did I do? How will I ever trust this guy? The whole thing ended with me freaking out, taking all of his stuff to his old house where his wife was moving out, and dumping him back on her. They DID get divorced, and remarried on their anniversary date, and are still married 15 years later. Me being in the picture only allowed him to shirk dealing with what was going on in his relationship.

We were together about 1. Instead of the one we had which deteriorated with mistrust. He talked circles around me, creating confusion, snarled his teeth at me. I could go on listing the variety of narcissistic and less than pleasant behaviours. Ultimately now, he has started a relationship with a foreign girl I discovered within less than a month of our split, possibly sooner, or whilst we were together??

So he must have either met her there, or literally gone to see her that weekend. Or could I have invested even more in that scenario and been even more dissapointed…? LostEnergy, Thank you for the lovely compliment — it really is great to hear how much sharing helps us all!

To that end, this man sounds like a complete jerk. No man should snarl and swear at you! I have been SO guilty of this. I think the most important thing is to trust your instincts. Does your instinct say that his behavior is the behavior of a good man? Also, if you feel like he judged you and your worth based on what happened when he was married…guess what? He was there engaging too and it take two to tango! It sounds like maybe there was some overlap with this out of country woman?

If he marked you down for not demanding he change his situation when you met, you can go ahead and mark HIM down for possibly being unfaithful to you and generally behaving poorly. I hope this helps! Maybe this was a last ditch attempt to stay invested. Not always helpful, these comments. LostEnergy, your name is very apt. Grace has done a fine job of showing the reality of being involved with a married man, but you miss a greater point.

You seem to think that telling someone to leave their wife gives you a respectful relationship. Being a respectful person who acts respectfully to themselves, others, and the people they affect begets a respectful relationship.

If you are with someone whose rule is to disrespect and you persist in being there trying to change them, they will continue to disrespect you and all routes lead to the same painful juncture — disrespect.

Own the decisions you made. Stop denying the reality of him. I soooo needed this! Oh yeah, it is so liberating and symbolic to delete him from all cyberspace communication.

I wonder less and less. New memories, each day another day to add to the I Like Me project. A few start-up glitches. But I expect the Project to be firmly established by the end of the year, be in a growth phase for at least the next couple years. I expect the I Like Me project to run for the next, oh, sixty years or so. Good for you creating your own memories in NY. It sounds like our initial phases of NC were similar. Blocking him from cybercontact has been the best part. You are right about the momentary satisfaction when he emails a little joke followed by two days of grief and stirred up emotions.

This post so struck me. God, trying to be the exception to the rule took so much negative energy. It sounds like you are doing great. Thanks for your support and comments.

Have fun! I think I am starting to understand how being an exception to the rule is how I was operating until now. I was always falling for the same guys: looks mysterious, oozes ambiguity, seems a little full of himself and always makes it a challenge for me to get their attention.

After all the reading here! And all the realizations! But what is the difference this time around? I caught myself being attracted to him.

I hope there will come a day when this automatic attraction to becoming the exception will go away. I know it will take hard work, but I owe it to myself to do this. BTW, today marked 4 months of NC, and it feels great to look back and realize just how much I have learned over this period thanks in part to stumbling on this site two weeks after I started the NC.

I am still healing and getting to know myself better, but boy is it a painful process! What was particularly hard for me was that my boyfriend of two years left me for the other woman! She was the exception to the rule. In my case, however, being the other woman did not make me the exception. It gets easier with time, however.

So I really empathise with your decisions and consequent feelings. Great article. I think that all of this boils down to: Do we really love ourselves? It really comes from a deep seated lack of love for ourselves that keeps us in these dead end non-sensical relationships. Also boils down to: Living authentically. I knew what I wanted for my life but bottom line I bent when I should have stayed rigid, gave my ex the benefit of the doubt when he did not deserve it.

Too bad there is nothing of substance on the inside to match the outside. More work to be done on myself. Said lovingly of course: Thank you Natalie.

That was one awesome post that I completely needed to hear. Trying desparetly to end a 1 year 3 month relationship. I am involved with the master of flowerly words and most recently a commitment to building a foundation with me.

He even put a lot of thought into it continues to have no regard for my feelings or boundaries. Single most difficult time in my life! Hi Erin, All I can say from personal experience is to sit down and have an honest conversation with yourself about what your needs and expectations are for a relationship.

You may even find it necessary to go no contact. Have the courage to want something better for yourself. Good luck, TJ. This time, because I had told him my reasons for breaking up with him in the first place, it would be different because he knows my expectations, and by him coming back, it means he is ready to deliver.

Fantasies and daydreams about a blissful life together, love, marriage and babies ensued. Four days later I have not heard a peep from him. I feel like i have had the horrible misfortune of getting entangled with a narcissistic psychopath who gets a sick twisted pleasure out of seeking me out to mind fuck me.

I imagine that he is sitting somewhere now remembering the look of hope and desparation in my eyes when he fed me the bullshit, the future faking, and laughing his head off at how sad I am to have believed any of it.

Never the girlfriend. Never the bride. Never the wife. Never Chosen. I still believe that I will set values, have boundaries and live authentically and one day, one day, meet a good man who treats me with trust, care, respect and love, and wants to have a committed, intimate, meaningful relationship with me. And I am also so sure now that he will never be that man as he simply doesnt know how to be that man.

I have blocked his number using a program I found on the internet this afternoon. I will never allow him into my home or office or have a conversation with him again to allow him a chance to mind fuck me again. I read that the first step to recovery in AA is acknowledging that you are powerless against alcohol. I have today acknowledged that I am powerless against him.

So I am not fighting anymore but simply pray that I will never hear from or see him again. Be thankful that you made the right choice in going NC, that you absolutely know now that he is a very messed up individual, and lift your head up. Should he ever try to contact you, meet it with a closed door.

Push the flush handle and flush him out of your life. What he has done is cruel. Cry your tears, be angry, mourn the loss of what you thought might be…and then get on with your life. You will have what you want and better with a better person. Sumumu,I have just read your heartfelt post and just wanted to reach out to you with a huge cyber hug of friendship and support. Of course you must feel wretched but Sumumu you have no reason to feel small or ashamed.

You did nothing wrong. You were stalked,duped and victimised by, as you rightly put it,a psycho narcissist. You were taken in by a smooth performance as any of us would have been.

So,as Natalie says,cry your tears and climb back on the wagon. We have all fallen off occasionally but your earlier work will stand to you and you will be back to your healthy ways again soon. I feel so moved by your post. Your words so resonate with me. There could be folks out there that actually appreciate us???? Sumumu, I just wanted to say how deeply sorry I am to hear that this happened to you. The other ladies have done a way better job than I could ever do of offering advice, but I wanted to show my support.

Wish you well. I have nothing else to add to what everyone else has said. Flush this inhumane piece of waste to the toilet and hold your head up high. Lots of people would have done the same as you. Good luck and really hope you are feeling a bit stronger reading all the encouraging comments. I am so sorry for all that you have been through.

This was such a cruel act he played , there is something seriously wrong with this man. Please keep on reading and come back for support. You are a very good writer, and great at expressing your feelings. For these things alone, you shoud feel great about yourself! The only ways to deal with him are two: 1. Playing HIS game before you do 1, above—but you have to do 1, period, whether you do this, 2, or not!

Used, I get your point but I think she has better things to do with her time than put so much energy into pissing him around. And game playing. I have seen women do exactly the same thing that these guys do so this is not even a man vs woman issue. I agree with what you say, but I think this guy has gone too too far, and is verrry diabolical about how he goes about things.

And, yes, women can be just as diabolical. But, based on my experience, men, on average, play more of these games, and the women are more straightforward. Men are unfortunately the ones with the powers to ask women out, and to ask women to marry them.

Which are the Ultimate powers in the dating world. Like this guy! But this guy deserves the treatment outlined about. Forget authenticity. And I have done this, too. And, yes, once I did make a fool out of the EUM. But his friends look at me as though I am their idol. Because no one expected sweet little nice-person, quiet me to be that way. Too much pain and energy has already been put into this, I think the healthiest thing would for her to try to get her life back.

If you pick up a hot coal with the intention to throw it at another — it is your hand that gets burned. It does not serve you — it only elongates the process. I can hold my head up high and know what I did was the next right thing.

Work on me. I am a work of art — a masterpiece created by my own hand — worthy of hanging on the refrigerator. So, as humiliating him worked to give him what was due to him, it also taught her a lesson, too, and made her realize how lucky she was to have had my support before. Anything I would of done would only give him an ego boost. Out of all the things I could have done, walking away clean and going complete NC was the smartest thing I have ever done. Game over. Used, you are just wrong with your statement, you are not the bigger person by doing that.

I have been reading here for years and so have you, but this guy from back then is still eating at you, seems that you have not moved on. Playing games is such a waste of time and who wants to be his friends idol? His friends admirations? Who wants that? You need to let go…. When the ex lied to the woman he left me for about continuing to sleep with me, I tape recorded us together and sent her the tape.

I felt totally justified and righteous at the time. It never occurred to me to opt out of the whole disgusting sordid mess. Heck no. I festered and they stayed together and she outright refused to believe the tape was real. They were together and made each other miserable for 12 years after he and I broke up. His friends admired me, sure, and years later he can joke about it and tell me he could just never hate me, but did I feel good about myself?

Did it hurt the ex? Was I high on the power trip and did I feel justified? Did I feel like utter crap? Some revenge!! Being able to out-crazy and one-up someone was my defense mechanism learned growing up in a violent home. Hate IS toxic attachment. It did not and does not continue to serve me as an adult, nor will it serve you.

I had to face the hard truth that I was addicted to my pain, addicted to my woundedness, addicted to my own toxicity, addicted to being right, addicted to my own self-pity, addicted to power trips and manipulation. Once I accepted that, then I started to get healthy very quickly and am more and more able to live and delight in the present moment.

Used, what can I say? But I disagree with what you say about men having the power to ask women out. Just like you asked any of your friends! I have a dear friend who never treated her AC badly because it would have been beneath her to act that way. I just want to echo what those who have responded to you have already expressed.

This jerk went out of his way to mess you around. People like this are too effed up to have heartfelt hopes and dreams and some need to try to stamp out the beauty and strength of those who do maintain hope and a generosity of heart. Oh and also want to doubly echo the comment about your writing. You write so compellingly, authentically and clearly.

Hi everyone! I have a question for all of you. A few days ago a female friend of his bought him a surprise-gift: a ticket to an event in another town, without him knowing it. There was no special occasion, so it was not his birthday or anything similar.

A mutual friend of ours told me that this girl had been flirting with him for a few weeks now. Would I do this. But, this would not be any of my concern. I hope you wish to move on? Well, in my situation, for the past months he had started to show interest in me again, and being SO consistent and SO believable, that I almost gave in again.

But, this Saturday we had to make a group trip, and he backed out because of this girl who got him this surprise present. Hence, a big argument between him and I, and hence me feeling really down and really confused.

Date, or at least research other options as well. It would feel… empowering! Yes, I think it is a desperate attempt, if she is trying to be more than friends. When my ex and I were involved in an unhealthy-post-breakup-FWB relationship, I actually considered giving him a present for his birthday.

I considered it for about a day, then decided it would be humiliating and desperate, and I would lose even more self-respect. All he did for my birthday a few months prior was send a text message. So, I decided my actions were those of someone in a relationship that did not exist.

I think Allison is right about staying stuck by staying invested in their business, which is really none of ours. I think we all go through this process, or at least most of us do. We are still doing the post-mortem relationship investigation. It would be wonderful if we could just magically shut down and never think about them again, but unfortunately most of us are not wired that way. Sometimes I wish I took a break from the organization, just to avoid seeing him for a while.

For the sake of my own nerves! In these days, the less I see him, the better. It would be a pity, because I really like this activity, not to mention that we are both board members. Plus, what am I going to tell the others?

We are all good friends, but very few of them know the whole story about me and this guy…. Sandra Every girl who is trying to get this guy is humiliating herself. Including you. They are feeding the drama and watching this soap opera unfold. By all means take a break. Go on holiday for a week. Keep things professional and cordial with him but no more. And maybe find new friends and activities that have nothing to do with him or them. You all seem to do a lot together and sometimes you just have to … do your own thing.

That is a tricky situation, and only you can decide for yourself if you need to take a break. And it probably feels a bit unfair that you should have to give up something you love doing. Really, only you can decide what is best for your mental health.

Sometimes, that healthy distance may not necessarily be a geographical distance, but it would definitely require a firm set of boundaries for yourself. I really do understand how tough that situation can be, as my ex is my neighbor. Thanks everyone for your advice! And here comes the last straw: last night I caught him lying as well!

But last night someone tagged him in a photo on Facebook, and he was in Venice with a different group than ours, on what seemed to be another organized trip. Your neighbour!!!! BTW, I like your nickname…and the message behind it! We can all do better than someone who only loves us part-time! Sorry Sandra Your post hit a nerve as I spent hours stalking my ex on facebook hangs head.

So while I sounded annoyed at you, I was more annoyed with myself. As for next week, wear something nice — flattering but not too sexy. Speak to him as little as possible, if you can get away with it, say nothing to him.

Afterwards, everyone may want to go to the pub. Waft away mysteriously. But if you do have better stuff to do, by all means do that! Good luck for Wednesday. Try not to stress about it — he really does only have as much power over you as you give him. There are thousands of individuals spanning history who have already done it. You could be next. Angela is a Digital Marketing Consultant and Lifestyle Coach who enjoys inspiring individuals to take action to achieve their ideal lifestyle.

She resides in Nashville, Tennessee where she enjoys sports and music when not reading and writing. Always happy to hear from other she looks forwarding to meeting from you! Stop by her site or any social media platform to leave her a note! I love the idea behind this.

I believe that this is something we all do. I always see myself wallowing over things and feeling hopeless when things get rough. Your email address will not be published. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. Get a special delivery each week with inspiration, inspiring profiles, free resources to help you up-level your life! Weekly inspiration, guidance, free resources and community! Artboard 3. June 21, Fierce Living.

Search for:. But what if we could? It all begins with a mind-shift change. You can have the success you see in others.

Woman Man

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